A
TWENTY-SOMETHING YEAR OLD MUSES ABOUT ADULTING
When
I was 19, I had a bit of an early quarter-life crisis. I realised that I was
about to vacate ‘teenagehood’, and in my head, that meant that I was about to
become a full-fledged adult.
And
being an adult terrified me. To my core.
You
see, when I was 16, I had a very utopian idea of what adulthood would be. I thought
I was going to seamlessly cruise into it and acquire everything I ever wanted in
a laughable amount of time. In my calculations, in fact, I was going to become
a billionaire by the age of 24.
I’m
going to be 24 this year. My 16-year-old self could not have been more
delusional about what my finances would look like at age 24.
But
I was a child, and as a child, the freedom of adulthood was very appealing. As a
teenage child especially, the thought of being allowed to live my own life the
way I wanted to live it, without having anyone dictate how my life would be
lived, was particularly alluring. And so, I could not wait to become an adult.
Anyways,
at age 19, I was already in the university, in my third year, and it was
quickly dawning on me that adulthood presented a plethora of terrifying
challenges, to wit – bills, responsibilities, social expectations, career challenges
and the likes. The thought of those aspects of adulthood were, to say lightly,
mortifying. More mortifying was the knowledge that I could not escape them,
that I could not wrap myself in the cocoon of the safety of childhood, that I could
not go to Neverland and be a child forever. No, I was going to grow up, pay
taxes, get a job, live alone and figure life out.
Now, I’m 23. I’m done with both university and the
Nigerian Law School. For the first time in a very long time, I have left the
structured institution of academia, and I am out in the real world. I’ve gotten
a job, my tax ID, and my driving learner’s permit. I’m expected to begin a
pension plan. My job offers health insurance. I’ve received my first official
paycheck as a lawyer. I no longer get a monthly allowance from my parents. A few
days ago, I began studying about investing and savings, getting myself
acclimatised with words like mutual funds and stocks and treasury bills and
ETFs. I’m currently looking towards getting a place and a car of my own.
I’m
adulting.
Due
to the fact that I am just setting out on my adulting journey, the questions, What are your plans for the next 5 years? and, What
do you intend to do with your life? are becoming more frequently asked. The
pressure of these monumental questions looms over my head and quite honestly
stresses me out. You see, the blueprint of my life is not clearly sketched out.
I mean, I have an idea of what I would like to do, and I know what I definitely
would not want to do, but I believe that I would have to be patient, trust God
and allow my life to unfold bit by bit.
If you
were to read my first blog post, I talked about wanting to live like Wole Soyinka,
in a brick house in the middle of a forest. Maybe sometime later that can be a
reality, but it’s not my reality right now. I wanted to live a life where I could
just write in the comfort of solitude and have all my biggest dreams as a
writer come to pass. That is a reality I’ve not cancelled out. I still believe
that I can live that life. Maybe not now, but sometime in the future. But right
now, I’m at the bottom of the labour pyramid, and I’ve come to realise that I simply
do not have the luxury to completely abandon the practice of the law and focus
squarely on my writing. At least not yet. I need a salary to function. I can
combine both for now.
Anyways,
I might be a young adult, new to the experience, but I’ve learnt a few things so
far. First, I’ve learnt to take things easy on myself. I’ve been thrust into a
fast-paced work environment where I have to learn things on the go and learn
them fast. It’s been a while since I’ve felt so much like a novice, scrambling
to get ahead of things, desperate to impress. I’ve managed to navigate living
in a brand new city, and finding my way around places, even though, I must
admit I’ve gotten lost once or twice. I’ve learnt to use new software, learnt
new methods of doing things, and I have had to come to terms with the fact that
I might make a lot of mistakes whilst trying to navigate things. I just have to
take things easy and deal with things one day at a time. Trying too hard to
figure things all out will just be a futile effort on my part.
Second,
I’ve learned that my decisions now have real, actual, serious consequences. I can
no longer afford to be reckless in making even the tiniest decisions in my
life, because I am at a point in which a single decision could spell out the
next couple of decades of my life. Decisions like the place I would like to
live, the career path I have chosen, the practice area that I work under in my
firm, and the way I spend my money, are decisions that are life-defining and
ones that I cannot just make on a whim.
Third,
I’ve learned that this is the period not to joke with God and my relationship
with Him. If there is any time in which I cannot afford to rely only on my
fickle wisdom, that I cannot afford to miss my quiet time and draw closer to
God, it is right now at such a sensitive season of my life. I have learned that
this is the time to trust God the most and follow his decisions for my life,
even when I might not know where he may be heading me towards.
And
finally, I’ve learned to get comfortable with change. There are a lot of changes
going on in my life. My address has changed, relationships have changed, my
parents’ house is no longer my permanent home address, but just a place where I
can visit during holidays, there are many friends of mine that I might not see physically
for years. My life as I used to know it is literally getting upended, and I have
to get comfortable with it. Otherwise, I will not be able to adjust
effectively.
So yeah,
the period of my life that I used to desire, then dread, is finally upon me. I’m
finally adulting. Wish me luck.
This is an ode to my first-ever blog post, which was made
back in 2022. When making my first post, I had no idea what I was doing, and
whether my blog would even gain any visibility, but today, in 2026, I’m proud
of the progress the blog has made. The blog gets about 3000 to 6000 monthly views,
and it is currently at 125k plus total views. Thanks to everyone who has ever
found my writing relevant enough to read and leave comments, and cheers to
greater heights.

